Pregnancy week; 39, Induction and SPD/PGP

16:34:00

Tomorrow I am exactly 39 weeks pregnant and this week has been HORRENDOUS. Because of the pelvis pain (Symphis Pubis Disorder/Pelvic Girdle Pain) I've not managed to take Jesse to school for the past couple of weeks. It's supposed to be a ten minute walk but it takes me just over an hour to get there and home again and after trying to walk him last week I just realised it wouldn't be possible. And then last Saturday something popped on the front of my vagina and I couldn't move at all. I couldn't sit, I couldn't stand, bend, walk, twist - I was completely disabled by some excruciatingly painful lock in my pelvis. I mean, it's been painful to walk up until then but imagine straining the ligament that holds your vagina in one piece - You never imagine how much pressure you actually put on your middle parts.

So I had to go to bed early as I couldn't get up/down the stairs. But in bed I realised I couldn't move to the side or to my back. It took ages and a lot of crying/shaking to get into it. Imagine then you're pregnant and need to go to the toilet 7 times a night... After the first long, traumatic time it took to get out I had to resort to peeing in a cup, sideways, whilst still being on the bed. Even that made me cry and scream from pain. After zero sleep I still couldn't move in the morning so we had to go to hospital. I had to lie down in the back of the car as putting the weight on my hips were the only way I could be.

They popped me onto a bed in the labour ward and monitored baby and me. Midwives and doctors came in and tried finding a solution. After about 3 hours I agreed to take Co-Codamol tablets, this resulted in more crying and anxiety and stress. I'm not someone who EVER use pain relief. I will go through pain because I know it ends. The only time I take paracetamol is if I have a headache as this is something I almost never get, and even then I take one half portion of children's Calpol. So 4 times during this pregnancy I've had a spoon of kids paracetamol. And the pains I've had in my back and hips since falling down the stairs 3 months ago would have made anyone pump up the drugs. But I just can not deal with how BAD medicine is for your body.

And then co-codamol. It's highly addictive and it causes withdrawal symptoms in newborn babies. You are not allowed to be on them for more than 3-5 days, so the thought of taking them makes me feel so bad.

Anyway. 8 hours after I arrived at hospital and still bed bound the doctor explained to me that co-codamol or a pethidine shot will take the pain away so at least I can get to the toilet and if I keep on the co-codamol I should be able to maintain a lower pain level and function enough (ENOUGH). Like I believed this? What on earth can a little bit of pain relief do except HIDE the pain and eventually make my pelvis worse? I had no choice. I had to spend the night on a cocktail of co-codamol and anti sickness shots due to me vomiting a lot from the medicine.

By Monday morning the pain had eased up a lot. I could walk and slowly get out of the bed (even though I walk a metre an hour and huff and puff due to the tightness/cramps/residual pain). The doctor came and said that they couldn't induce me that day as I need to be 39 weeks and agreed to send me home with co-codamol until tomorrow Saturday when I should be induced (as long as the ward isn't full). I can't be on the medicine for any longer so baby has to come out.


It's scary beyond words and thoughts. I've had natural labours without any pain relief and that's how I believe ALL labours should go. I dread needles, being hooked up and start this in such an unnatural way. I'm not even sure HOW they'll do it. I've read that the pessary tablet can take days, whilst the midwife explained they'll try to break my waters first and maybe put me on a drip which will speed it up. I've had no vaginal exams this pregnancy so for them to be able to just break the waters I need to already be dilated a couple of centimetres, which is what you get hormones for.
I know Skyler is engaged, and super low - and this generally speeds things up but it still isn't reassuring me on how all this will go. I still sit here hoping to naturally go into labour before induction but I don't think I will :(
It's still very painful for me to walk and sit and I can't at all be on my back or twist around in bed so I'm not sure how my pelvis will survive this whole baby ordeal!

I'm just so ready to meet my baby now. I've been sofa bound since Monday and with Christmas only 6 days away I can't do this anymore. My kids depend on me cooking and being there. It's useless feeling this useless :(


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